So, like most young adults I began this year with zest, enthusiasm and about twelve different new years resolutions. Lose weight, stop smoking, do better at school, get a part time job etc... What made me different I thought, was that I was actually sticking to them; I joined the gym and was losing weight, was on a diet I actually liked and felt confident enough to think about dating more realistically... In terms of my school work I started with a few bum notes but turned them into symphonies within a month and a half and then one day it all just went a little pear shaped and I had trouble recovering from one mishap without doing harm to the other.I fell off the diet and cut down on my gym hours, got a part time job but failed to budget properly, started smoking again and so on. The only thing that seemed to be under control, partly because I felt it was in the hands of a higher power (yes I am a Christian) were my school marks which are higher than they have ever been in my life but now, it's about four months later and exam time and I am finding it somewhat difficult to study as hard as I know I have to if I want my term marks to reflect in my exams.
It's awful and it really has to stop. I don't want to be the victim of my own laziness. This year was meant to be a year of change and I was changing for the better. Suddenly I feel as though it's me grasping for straws and the only difference between this and last year's behaviour is that this time I know which straws to grab if I want to stay afloat. I guess that's why I've started a new blog to document my 'mid-year's resolutions' <- also known as recovery from 'not fully achieved new years resolutions'.. I need to do it better this time around, I need to face myself and in the words of Keane tell myself, "You can do so much better than this"...
